Success and the Shy Girl Podcast

Six in the Fix – Part One

Episode

Sep 23, 2017

 

So this is a bit longer (and later) than we had expected to get this posted, but we promise it’s worth the wait! It’s in two parts, so be sure to click through to part two to complete out the process. We’re also working on a free printable module that you can use to walk you through the steps to shifting your mindset! Stay tuned and follow us on Facebook to be notified when it is published!
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If you’re as old as we are (which isn’t very old thankyouverymuch) you’ve probably heard of four on the floor and five in the drive. They’re terms to describe driving a standard car. I’m going to introduce to a new term, completely unrelated to driving, but completely relevant if you’re looking to accelerate growth in your business or career; six in the fix.

And of course, we’re going to use an acronym, because acronyms are cool.

G.R.O.W.T.H.

Six shifts towards success (see what I did there?).

G – Get Real with Yourself
R – Recognize a Fixed Mindset
O – Observe how it makes You Feel
W – Write Yourself a new Story
T – Take Action
H – Habit, Habit, Habit

This is an exercise that I’ve started using when I’m not finding myself where I’d like to be, to figure out if my mindset is subconsciously blocking me from moving forward.

Get real with Yourself

This is perhaps the most important step, and of course why it comes first. Do you really and truly want to change? Are you willing to get uncomfortable for a little while? You can not proceed without getting a little uncomfortable for a bit. You need to be able to have some capability here for real introspection and answering yourself honestly.

Action:
Take a hard look at your past successes and failures. What we really want you to do is  connect your mindset around them to why these events were success or failures (at least how you’ve defined success, because one woman’s success is another woman’s failure).

Let’s say that you were opening an ice cream shop and you hold your grand opening and no one, not even your mother, shows up. Yikes, right? Is it really a yikes moment though? Most people would say yes. Heck, I’d probably say yes.

What are the questions or thought that would come to mind for you immediately? For me, it would be “I am an epic failure” and “even my own mother hates me” (even though I know with absolute certainty that she doesn’t. See that right there? That’s a fixed mindset. I’ve set a finite limit on myself with absolutely no chance to even explore my own capability or capacity for growth as a business owner.

Recognize a Fixed Mindset

This seems like it should be easy right? Well, success rarely follows an easy path so… nope, recognizing a fixed mindset is rarely easy. In fact it is downright difficult at times. Just because it’s hard to do doesn’t mean it’s not important because recognizing limiting mindsets because it is crucial to shifting them. So…how do you recognize a fixed mindset?

Action:
Look at your thoughts around a situation. Do they:
– Blame the situation or outside influences for the failure or success? (if only someone had come to my ice cream shop opening…)
– Limit your personal attributes like intelligence or capability for success? (I’m such a failure or I’ll never succeed or Will I never learn?!)
– Show an unwillingness to accept failure as part of success and as an opportunity for growth? (I may as well give up I’ll just fail again)
– Prompt you over and over to try and prove yourself to others (If I don’t succeed, everyone else will see me as stupid/naïve/untalented etc).

Those right there, although certainly not an exhaustive list, are key indicators of a fixed mindset.

Observe how it makes you feel.

Chances are, if you have done the above step, you’ll realize that at some point you’ve been operating from a fixed mindset. And that’s ok. Because you’re human. Maybe you’re indifferent, maybe you’re mad, maybe you’re disappointed in yourself. Acknowledge the emotion. Feel the emotion and then LET IT GO. Because wallowing in self-pity is not going to move you forward towards the successes you are attempting to achieve. It seems fulfilling for a little while (I like an excuse to indulge in a little chocolate every now and then too), but have you ever noticed how a black hole sucks all the light from nearby? Emotion can be like that. Emotion is important, but it can also be a black hole. If you need time to grieve over a loss in your business or professional life, please do so but recognize that at some point you need to let go of negative emotion if you ever want to move forward.

You’ll need to click through to read Part Two.

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